uglY cOUsin – Never met a Jimmy we didn't like
Chauncy, the uglY cOUsin tuxedo cat, has been demanding a greater role in our work here in Flyover, USA. He is tired of just being the pretty face of memes. Lacking the resoluteness of a cat, I have given in. Now Chauncy is the official ugly philosopher at uglYcOUsin.com. I told him we were trying …
Earlier this week, L thought she would enjoy a side of baked Cheetos to complement her lunch of cold chicken and tomatoes. Little did she know what this innocent decision would lead to. Usually, all one has to fear from eating a delicious Cheeto is the tell-tale orange finger syndrome. Cheeto powder has been known …
I forgot to bring earbuds on the plane. Yes, even discarded dolls like myself are allowed to fly. The flight was two hours and I had exhausted my reading material, so I decided to play the games on the little screen provided on the back of the seat facing me. Backgammon. “Sorry, unable to load.” …
You probably don’t remember me, but I was Larry the stinky kid in second grade. Maybe you thought my name was simply stinky kid and didn’t even know I was Larry. I hated Halloween. I lived in a cinder block house on the highway with half-buried tires along the perimeter of our drive. We used …
This Halloween, make the only time these kids have walked on a sidewalk even more memorable. No one will recall who gave them that KitKat when it falls out of a bag amongst 40 other KitKats. Being acceptable and normal is boring. There are only two ways of making your Halloween hand-outs stand out: 1) …
Herb stared at a nickel resting upon a small wooden box on his desk. Though staring at things or at no-things instead of talking to me wasn’t unusual, I sensed an electricity of thought connecting his eyes to that nickel. It didn’t appear to me that he was looking through it, the way he often …
uglY cOUsin – Never met a Jimmy we didn't like
Chauncy, the uglY cOUsin tuxedo cat, has been demanding a greater role in our work here in Flyover, USA. He is tired of just being the pretty face of memes. Lacking the resoluteness of a cat, I have given in. Now Chauncy is the official ugly philosopher at uglYcOUsin.com. I told him we were trying …
Earlier this week, L thought she would enjoy a side of baked Cheetos to complement her lunch of cold chicken and tomatoes. Little did she know what this innocent decision would lead to. Usually, all one has to fear from eating a delicious Cheeto is the tell-tale orange finger syndrome. Cheeto powder has been known …
I forgot to bring earbuds on the plane. Yes, even discarded dolls like myself are allowed to fly. The flight was two hours and I had exhausted my reading material, so I decided to play the games on the little screen provided on the back of the seat facing me. Back
gammon. “Sorry, unable to load.” …
You probably don’t remember me, but I was Larry the stinky kid in second grade. Maybe you thought my name was simply stinky kid and didn’t even know I was Larry. I hated Halloween. I lived in a cinder block house on the highway with half-buried tires along the perimeter of our drive. We used …
This Halloween, make the only time these kids have walked on a sidewalk even more memorable. No one will recall who gave them that KitKat when it falls out of a bag amongst 40 other KitKats. Being acceptable and normal is boring. There are only two ways of making your Halloween hand-outs stand out: 1) …
Herb stared at a nickel resting upon a small wooden box on his desk. Though staring at things or at no-things instead of talking to me wasn’t unusual, I sensed an electricity of thought connecting his eyes to that nickel. It didn’t appear to me that he was looking through it, the way he often …