4 Confessions of a Horrible Houseguest - The Nest
4 Confessions of a Horrible Houseguest
Remember that houseguest who threw an all-night rager (without asking) and trashed your place? We’ve found a houseguest who’s even worse. His rep is so bad he’s been disinvited more times than he can count (You can imagine how horrified his wife is). In the interest of changing his ways — and maybe getting invited back for a change — he agreed to fess up about his worst-ever deeds (you won’t believe #3!) and share the lessons he’s learned. Click through for his confessions, and share your houseguest horror stories in the comments section!
Photo: Thinkstock1 of 4 Obey the Unspoken CurfewLast year, my wife Diana and I had fun over the holidays, staying with our friends in their huge NYC loft. We haven’t been invited back. Diana says I blew it the night I went out with some guy friends, lost my key, and ended up waking our hosts and their baby at 4 a.m. It also didn’t help that, in my drunkenness, I teased my bleary-eyed friend mercilessly about his bedhead and then proceeded to raid the fridge. In retrospect, I shouldn’t have stayed out so late in the first place. Next time I’ll ask my hosts about their nighttime schedule and obey the law. It limits my barhopping hours, but when I consider the alternative—a cot at Motel 6—I know it’s a smart move.Photo: Shutterstock 2 of 4 Don’t Do as You’re ToldOne refrain hosts love to use is, “Don’t worry about it.” I ask if I can help clean the dishes. “Sit down, relax—don’t worry about it.” I ask if they’d like me to change the bed. “We’ve got it—don’t worry about it.” What I realize now? “Don’t worry about it” really means “Just do it, you idiot.” Hosts will rarely ask for favors, but, man, how they love receiving them. So from now on, I vow to exceed their expectations: cooking a surprise dinner, supplying my own towels, and—drumroll, please—doing the dishes after every meal.Photo: Thinkstock 3 of 4 Do Crap You Don’t Wanna DoWhen we stay with people, we’re typically in vacation mode, so I treat it as such. But, apparently, there’s a difference between a holiday at a friend’s home and at the Holiday Inn. I’ve gotten dirty looks for sleeping in late, watching the game while everyone else is out at the Renaissance Faire, and bringing back Starbucks—just for myself. Once a friend grilled us salmon for dinner, and I sent it back because it had too many bones. Diana was mortified. What? I have a phobia of choking. Bottom line: I was only thinking about Numero Uno and needed to change. Little things, like offering to pick up DVDs or making a morning coffee run for everyone in the house, go a long way. Bonus points if you take their orders (no foam, extra hot, decaf—you get the idea).Photo: Thinkstock 4 of 4Show Some Gratitude AlreadyWriting a thank-you note to your hosts is an absolute must. It’s also about as natural to a guy as French braiding. I often forget to do it, and even if I do remember, it’s difficult for me to betray my masculinity and stop by Papyrus to purchase the card. My solution for the digital age: a quick one-line email, e-card, or “thank-you” link to photos taken from the weekend. Or broker a deal: If your spouse writes the card, you’ll agree to do some annoying task your other half doesn’t want to bother with. The lessons here? I learned to treat being a houseguest as a privilege, not a free pass. I learned to pitch in and not sit back. Oh, and just so you know…we’re free on Presidents’, Memorial, and Arbor Day. So, when’s my invite coming in the mail?
Entertaining guests at your place? Swap hosting tips and tricks with other Nesties on our community boards here!
Best Host and Hostess Gifts Under $30
08/21/13entertaining, house & home, houseguests
7 Secrets to Marital Bliss (and Why They Work)	next
House Hunting in 5 Cities: What Can You Get for $300,000?	The Stats on Your Kitchen Remodel	A New Take On a Fourth of July Fete (With Grilled Pi...	4 Expert Ideas for Transforming a Space Through Colo...	Decorate the Backyard with DIY Oilcloth Pillows	11 Summer Decor Ideas That Won’t Break the Ban...	Ellen DeGeneres Launches New Lifestyle Collection	Denise
08/27/13 at 07:48
Ugh! This guy’s terrible! My parents (and aunts) drilled it into our heads at an early age that when you’re invited to a friend’s house, make sure to be the kind of houseguest they’d want to invite again. Even if you don’t get another opportunity to stay at the same friend’s house, they’ll have good things to say when someone asks how your stay was.
08/28/13 at 12:22
I actually don’t like when house guests try and help out around the house. Most of the time they end up putting things in incorrect places and it takes me a while to find it! I’d rather them just actually sit there and do nothing then try and help and get in my way!
08/28/13 at 01:39
Wow, this guy is terrible! I don’t like it when people clean up at my house either. Taking out the garbage or letting the dog out is one thing, but actually cleaning up if you don’t know where things go can be a real pain. Oh, and use my guest towels!! That is why we have EXTRA TOWELS, and pillows, new toothbrushes ect!
08/28/13 at 06:26
I wouldn’t say I’ve had a bad house guest but I have had a bad experience. It was a week before me and my hubby got married and his best man came to stay with us a week before. The first issue is he picked up the wrong bag at the airport so we had to drive him back to the airport to return it which was fine accidents happen but his was still missing. I had began to notice he was starting to smell, I offered to take him to Walmart to get a fresh change of clothes and he declined saying he wanted to wait to see if they found his bag. Ok, so when we got home I suggested he could take a shower and put the clothes he was wearing back on so he could at least get a shower in, he declined. The next day I suggested the shower again and he said no but he wanted to get some clothes at Walmart. So we go and he gets some new outfits, I had to remind him to get new underwear which he almost passed up. Eww! We finally got home from our shopping trip and he showered he still smelt after he got out of the shower I don’t think he actually used soap. Plus he didn’t get a tooth brush so he hadn’t brushed his teeth either! Long story short he was sleeping on our couch the time he was staying with us and even though I put a sheet down I still had to fabreeze my couch like 10 times! Nicest guy but be respectful of our house and couch and shower! House Guest rule: always shower! Everyday! Don’t be the smelly guest! Don’t be that guy!
Amina BAM
08/28/13 at 08:32
I always feel awkward and rushed when my guests try to clean. It’s one thing to pick up some dishes on Thanksgiving and put them on the counter but please don’t clear the table or wash my dishes! When my guests try to help I start rushing to get things done so they can’t help and then I get frustrated. While I admit it might be nice for a guest to surprise me by ordering dinner in (no one cooks in my kitchen without my supervision! ) what if I already had our dinner planned for that night? Don’t treat me like a hotel, yes, but please remember you are my guest!
▼ FROM OUR PARTNERS ▼8 Decorating Apps Your Home Needs NowThis Hack For Hanging Outdoor String Lights Will Make Your SummerThe Broke Girl's Guide to Boho DecorFollow The Nest Blog!
4 Confessions of a Horrible Houseguest - The Nest
4 Confessions of a Horrible Houseguest
Remember that houseguest who threw an all-night rager (without asking) and trashed your place? We’ve found a houseguest who’s even worse. His rep is so bad he’s been disinvited more times than he can count (You can imagine how horrified his wife is). In the interest of changing his ways — and maybe getting invited back for a change — he agreed to fess up about his worst-ever deeds (you won’t believe #3!) and share the lessons he’s learned. Click through for his confessions, and share your houseguest horror stories in the comments section!
Photo: Thinkstock1 of 4 Obey the Unspoken CurfewLast year, my wife Diana and I had fun over the holidays, staying with our friends in their huge NYC loft. We haven’t been invited back. Diana says I blew it the night I went out with some guy friends, lost my key, and ended up waking our hosts and their baby at 4 a.m. It also didn’t help that, in my drunkenness, I teased my bleary-eyed friend mercilessly about his bedhead and then proceeded to raid the fridge. In retrospect, I shouldn’t have stayed out so late in the first place. Next time I’ll ask my hosts about their nighttime schedule and obey the law. It limits my barhopping hours, but when I consider the alternative—a cot at Motel 6—I know it’s a smart move.Photo: Shutterstock 2 of 4 Don’t Do as You’re ToldOne refrain hosts love to use is, “Don’t worry about it.” I ask if I can help clean the dishes. “Sit down, relax—don’t worry about it.” I ask if they’d like me to change the bed. “We’ve got it—don’t worry about it.” What I realize now? “Don’t worry about it” really means “Just do it, you idiot.” Hosts will rarely ask for favors, but, man, how they love receiving them. So from now on, I vow to exceed their expectations: cooking a surprise dinner, supplying my own towels, and—drumroll, please—doing the dishes after every meal.Photo: Thinkstock 3 of 4 Do Crap You Don’t Wanna DoWhen we stay with people, we’re typically in vacation mode, so I treat it as such. But, apparently, there’s a difference between a holiday at a friend’s home and at the Holiday Inn. I’ve gotten dirty looks for sleeping in late, watching the game while everyone else is out at the Renaissance Faire, and bringing back Starbucks—just for myself. Once a friend grilled us salmon for dinner, and I sent it back because it had too many bones. Diana was mortified. What? I have a phobia of choking. Bottom line: I was only thinking about Numero Uno and needed to change. Little things, like offering to pick up DVDs or making a morning coffee run for everyone in the house, go a long way. Bonus points if you take their orders (no foam, extra hot, decaf—you get the idea).Photo: Thinkstock 4 of 4Show Some Gratitude AlreadyWriting a thank-you note to your hosts is an absolute must. It’s also about as natural to a guy as French braiding. I often forget to do it, and even if I do remember, it’s difficult for me to betray my masculinity and stop by Papyrus to purchase the card. My solution for the digital age: a quick one-line email, e-card, or “thank-you” link to photos taken from the weekend. Or broker a deal: If your spouse writes the card, you’ll agree to do some annoying task your other half doesn’t want to bother with. The lessons here? I learned to treat being a houseguest as a privilege, not a free pass. I learned to pitch in and not sit back. Oh, and just so you know…we’re free on Presidents’, Memorial, and Arbor Day. So, when’s my invite coming in the mail?
Entertaining guests at your place? Swap hosting tips and tricks with other Nesties on our community boards here!
Best Host and Hostess Gi
fts Under $30
08/21/13entertaining, house & home, houseguests
7 Secrets to Marital Bliss (and Why They Work)	next
House Hunting in 5 Cities: What Can You Get for $300,000?	The Stats on Your Kitchen Remodel	A New Take On a Fourth of July Fete (With Grilled Pi...	4 Expert Ideas for Transforming a Space Through Colo...	Decorate the Backyard with DIY Oilcloth Pillows	11 Summer Decor Ideas That Won’t Break the Ban...	Ellen DeGeneres Launches New Lifestyle Collection	Denise
08/27/13 at 07:48
Ugh! This guy’s terrible! My parents (and aunts) drilled it into our heads at an early age that when you’re invited to a friend’s house, make sure to be the kind of houseguest they’d want to invite again. Even if you don’t get another opportunity to stay at the same friend’s house, they’ll have good things to say when someone asks how your stay was.
08/28/13 at 12:22
I actually don’t like when house guests try and help out around the house. Most of the time they end up putting things in incorrect places and it takes me a while to find it! I’d rather them just actually sit there and do nothing then try and help and get in my way!
08/28/13 at 01:39
Wow, this guy is terrible! I don’t like it when people clean up at my house either. Taking out the garbage or letting the dog out is one thing, but actually cleaning up if you don’t know where things go can be a real pain. Oh, and use my guest towels!! That is why we have EXTRA TOWELS, and pillows, new toothbrushes ect!
08/28/13 at 06:26
I wouldn’t say I’ve had a bad house guest but I have had a bad experience. It was a week before me and my hubby got married and his best man came to stay with us a week before. The first issue is he picked up the wrong bag at the airport so we had to drive him back to the airport to return it which was fine accidents happen but his was still missing. I had began to notice he was starting to smell, I offered to take him to Walmart to get a fresh change of clothes and he declined saying he wanted to wait to see if they found his bag. Ok, so when we got home I suggested he could take a shower and put the clothes he was wearing back on so he could at least get a shower in, he declined. The next day I suggested the shower again and he said no but he wanted to get some clothes at Walmart. So we go and he gets some new outfits, I had to remind him to get new underwear which he almost passed up. Eww! We finally got home from our shopping trip and he showered he still smelt after he got out of the shower I don’t think he actually used soap. Plus he didn’t get a tooth brush so he hadn’t brushed his teeth either! Long story short he was sleeping on our couch the time he was staying with us and even though I put a sheet down I still had to fabreeze my couch like 10 times! Nicest guy but be respectful of our house and couch and shower! House Guest rule: always shower! Everyday! Don’t be the smelly guest! Don’t be that guy!
Amina BAM
08/28/13 at 08:32
I always feel awkward and rushed when my guests try to clean. It’s one thing to pick up some dishes on Thanksgiving and put them on the counter but please don’t clear the table or wash my dishes! When my guests try to help I start rushing to get things done so they can’t help and then I get frustrated. While I admit it might be nice for a guest to surprise me by ordering dinner in (no one cooks in my kitchen without my supervision! ) what if I already had our dinner planned for that night? Don’t treat me like a hotel, yes, but please remember you are my guest!
▼ FROM OUR PARTNERS ▼8 Decorating Apps Your Home Needs NowThis Hack For Hanging Outdoor String Lights Will Make Your SummerThe Broke Girl's Guide to Boho DecorFollow The Nest Blog!